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DT. vs Karciama
DT. went to the station of the air base and noticed that his robotic turtle was on the verge of expiration, lying in the middle of the station. He quickly ran up to him and he felt vibrations from the ground. He took the turtle and ran from the epicenter and the ground started to collapse. After some narrow dodges and high jumps, he finally got to safe ground. There was a huge hole in the ground and right above it was a gigantic hexapedal robot. It started to turn to the right and stopped when the DT. was to the right of the robot. A sphere rose up from inside the robot and the inside of the sphere opened. From it, Karciama exited. "Well if it isn't tough Turtle. Just a little too late, as usual..." - Karciama said mockingly, with a cigar in his mouth. "Tavern?! Impressive little toy you've got there. But your plan ends here." - DT. replied. Karciama laughed: "Idiot. You're not ending our plan, you're expanding it. Checked the internet lately?" DT. scoffed. Then he received a call from Weirdoverse: "DT.! The admins are turning back to yeah^2!" - Weirdo quickly warned him. DT. was in disbelief. "What? How'd they know?" - he asked. "Someone posted photos of what's happening at the base. The whole world is up in arms!" - Weirdoverse quickly explained. "Show me!" - DT. quickly opened up his browser and went to the media. His whole screen was filled with photos of dead memes with headlines telling that the yeah^2 memelord was almost killed by Pakistani normies. "How did they...? The story leaked early...? Then Tavern's plan is ruined." - DT. considered. "The hell it is!" - Weirdoverse interrupted him. "Look what they're saying! The story just went live and already are they calling for blood!" And indeed, the comments showed how the yeah^2ers were in rage, leaving comments about extincting the normies. "But the memelord saved...?" - DT. was confused. "And yet memer blood was spilled." - Karciama replied. "By memers!" - DT. was still confused. "Besides, a few dozen memers is tragic, but nothing to start major drama over." "That's just the spark, son. The excuse we've been waiting for. yeah^2 wanted this drama for years. The original group - they knew drama was good for the memes. Four years later, their legacy lingers on..." - Karciama explained. "The bias..." - DT. realized. "They left us their great "ism"s!. Retardism! Whinism! Maxism! Welcome maxims for those with no faith - without guiding principles of their own. Give yourself up to the whole. No need to better yourself - you're a MAXer! You're number one! Then the only value left is dollar value - the MAXes. So we'll do whatever it takes to keep it humming along. Even drama. Especially drama." - Karciama continued. "Bullpoop!" - DT. was in disbelief once again. "The original group planted the seed - we don't need them to foster their bias any longer. We're spreading it just fine ourselves. Every memer man, woman and child... We're all sons of the Originals now! We just need something to jumpstart the MAXing out of this funk. This halt has been stuck since the fall of GOG." Karciama once again explained. "Pfuh. And the obunga costs? Wasting billions is going to help MAXing? - DT. saw obvious flaws in his plan. "Testhrllos channels, @pipy chains... Job creators, Turtle! All those memers spending MAXes, paying taxes... Trust me, a little drama can work wonders. - Karciama countered him. "So grease the gears with some retard blood, is that it?" - DT. pulled out his meme efficiency sword and pointed it at Karciama. "Relax, Turtle. It's a "war on normies". We're not out to kill memers. Protesters. Lawless groups. Whyienners. Of course that would have to include you." - Karciama finished smoking his cigar "Wouldn't want any eyewitness reports complicating the message." Karciama threw his cigar at DT., which he cut in half with his sword, and went back into the sphere, which went back inside the body of the robot. DT. prepared for battle and so did Karciama. Karciama spun his robot to face DT. directly and made the robot unleash a mighty roar. The roar knocked DT. back slightly, but nothing too bad. The robot possessed two giant heated blades, which he used to attempt to slice DT. to pieces, but DT. dodged them easily while managing to damage them. Then the robot proceeds to swipe the entire area with his blades, but DT. once again manages to dodge them by slipping past a small gap between the blades. The robot then spins 60 degrees left and attempts to crush DT. using the giant robot feet. Once again, he fails as DT. is far too nimble for him to hit. DT. jumps on the leg, pierces it's armor and cuts it clean off. The robot experiences an A.I error and DT. has a chance to hit the core of the robot, which damages the robot itself greatly. Now Karciama shows his double plasma cannons but fails to hit DT. again. Karciama turns the robot 60 degrees right and the same happens with this leg. This time though, Karciama had forgotten he had his blades out and DT. used this as a chance to greatly damage the robot. He used a surge of meme power to suplex the robot and throw him to the other side. Then he proceeded to rip off one of his blades and use it as a weapon. Karciama tried to block DT. hits but eventually let him slam the robot's body with the blade. The sphere once again went outside of the robot's body, the door opened and Karciama once again exited it. He was coughing while he was chuckling as the entire sphere was filled with smoke: "Slippery little bastard. I don't have time for this. - Karciama was slightly annoyed at this. Karciama then proceeded to make a mighty stomp and started grunting (no he isn't shitting). The robot started to shake as all the wiring inside the robot started heading towards Karciama. "Oh you've gotta be kidding me" - DT. thought he was done with Karciama. Then, from all the wires, a green glow started to head towards Karciama. He unleashed a mighty roar and all the wires and the robot dropped down to the floor, obviously fried. Karciama appeared to be even more buff than before. He fixed his position as he grew higher as well. "Let's go!" - Karciama wanted to fight. "The hell are you thinking?!" - DT. was obviously confused. How could a man match up to a memeborg? Karciama then dashed towards DT. and hit him hard. DT. didn't have a chance to get up before Karciama grabbed him by his head and started squeezing it. "Played with my dick, you know." - Karciama explained his usual strength. "That's a false myth!" - DT. tried to teach him. Karciama headbutted him and broke his AMR (Artificial Meme Reality) glasses, then punched him right in the cheek. He tried to hit him again but this time DT. had realized Karciama was seriously stronger than him and dodged his hit. He pulled out his sword and tried to cut him into pieces but Karciama was blocking his sword with his bare hands. Eventually, Karciama got DT. by his hands and tried to hit his head but failed, but managed to get him by his throat and lifted him up. "Try checking those things yourself. Coulda gone MAX if i hadn't lost common sense. I'm not one of those weakling Griffins. I could break the memelord in two... with my bare hands!" - Karciama tossed DT. into the sky. "Don't fuck with this objector!" - He kicked him just as he fell down and DT. hit the sphere. A moment of cheering for such a good kick. DT. stands up, slightly damaged, and asks: "What the hell are you?" Karciama laughs and replies: "Why don't you stick around and find out?" DT. still tries to use his sword to damage Karciama in any way but fails miserably, as all of his hits do absolutely nothing, meanwhile Karciama is launching slow and powerful blows that DT. dodges quite easily. After a while Karciama grabs DT.'s sword. "What?" - DT. can't believe what he is seeing. "Nice knife." - Karciama says, then he clenches his fist and the sword breaks. DT. is visibly surprised. Such swords are built to last and he just broke it with no effort. Karciama tries to upper cut him but DT. just barely dodges that hit. He takes a moment to appreciate what he just avoided but just as he turns back to Karciama he gets hit in the cheek again but way harder. He slides across the top of the robot with his jaw. As he stands up, he notices a sharp pain in his jaw (obviously) because his fucking memeborg jaw is glowing red hot. DT. in frustration throws his broken sword at Karciama, which he deflects while running at him. Karciama launches two powerful blows, which DT. dodges, but then launches a blow straight at DT. which he decides to block instead. "Typical grand memer... big photos, but all trash." - DT. tries to discourage him "What?" - Karciama asks. ""Jumpstart the MAXing"? What a load of bullpoop! - DT. pushed Karciamas fist away. "All you care about is making your own memes. That, and your pin amounts. You've got no memeing skills, just like all the rest. If yeah^2's gone to poop, then you're just another maggot, crawling in the pile." - DT. rambled on, while countering and counterattacking Karciamas hits. Karciama chuckled: "Alright, the truth then. You're right about one thing... I do need memes. And pins. Wanna know why? "I have a dream." - Karciama prepared his true explanation. "What?" - DT. wasn't expecting that quote. "That one day every person in this server will control their OWN memes." - Karciama slowly approached DT. while he was backing up. "A category of the TRULY free, dammit." - He clenched his fist and raised it above his head. "A server of LOGIC, not emotions. Ruled by INTELLIGENTS, not brainlets. Where the memes change to suit the memer, not the other way around. Where germanpower and quitins IQ are back where they belong: in the hands of the people!" - Karciama attacks DT. and pushes him to the edge of the robot. They slam heads. "Where every man is free to meme - to post - for himself!" - Karciama forces DT. on his knees. "Fuck all these limp-dick chainers and chicken-shit zyhrllians. Fuck this 24/7 discord spew of zyhrllos and "funny" bullshit. Fuck "yeah^2 pride". Fuck the chain channels. Fuck all of it! - Karciama constantly beats DT. while ranting. "yeah^2 is diseased. Rotten to the core. There's no saving it - we need to pull it out by the roots. Wipe all the channels clean. BURN IT DOWN!" - Karciama gets DT. to the ground. "And from the ashes a new yeah^3 will be born. Evolved, but untamed! The inactive will be purged, and the active will thrive - free to meme as they see fit. They'll make yeah servers great again!" - Karciama enters Trump mode briefly. "What the heck are you talking about..." - DT. manages to sprout a few words. "You still don't get it. I'm using drama as a business to become owner... so I can end drama as a business. In my new yeah^3, people will get banned and ban for what they BELIEVE! Not for MAXes. Not for blunts! Not for what they're told is right. Every man will be free to make his own dramas!" - Karciama furiously stomps on DT. chest until stopping abruptly. Karciama lights up another cigar and asks: "So... what do you think?" "How the heck did you get memer status..." - DT. once again barely manages to say anything. Karciama chuckles and answers: "Well, I don't make my own memes. You should try fighting something you believe in, Turtle. Not for a server, a group or for anyone else." - Karciama smokes his cigar. "Maybe I was wrong about you" - DT. slowly gets up. "Am I finally getting through?" - Karciama helps DT. get up. "I'll rid this world of pointless arguments, Turtle." - He offers him a handshake. "I was wrong. You're not greedy." - DT. accepts his handshake and even hugs him. "You're batpoop insane!" - Karciama appears shocked by this meanwhile DT. jumps on his arm and throws Karciama away. Both of them slowly get up from the ground. Karciama becomes greatly distressed from this betrayal. "Making the mother of all omelettes here, Turtle. Can't fret over every egg." - Karciama tries to convince him "Not when you're "purging the inactive", right? What do you know about "the inactive"? You weren't born with 3000 ms. You've never lagged. You don't know what it's like to wait and wait and wait just to converse..." - DT. argues. "But you did converse! Through sheer force of will, following your own set of practices. With your own two hands, you took back your internet!" - Karciama tried to make him an example of the strong. "And now I'll take yours." - DT. prepared to fist fight Karciama. A hit here, a dodge there, DT. tried his best but just couldn't harm Karciama in any way. After a short time of fighting, Karciama finally got DT. good. DT. barely got up but still tried to harm Karciama by charging up his fist with memepower and hitting him in the chest. It didn't work at all. DT. activated his inner jojo and charged both his fists up and started hitting Karciama really fast repeatedly. After it didn't work, he charged his fists even more and started hitting him again. This time the fists were giving somewhat of an impact. Then he fully charged his fists and hit him with them both at the same time. It knocked him back far but didn't do any damage at all. "Why won't you die?!" - DT. is visibly mad. Karciama laughs and tears off his shirt, giving an explanation to his apparent invulnerability: "Meme essence, son." - Karciama demonstrates his ability. "It hardens in response to unfunny memepowers." - He inspects his hardened fist and slams it into the robot, creating a huge dent and crack. "You can't hurt me, Turtle." DT. still tries and fails, meanwhile Karciama laughs at his attempt: "What did i just say?" Karciama uppercuts him into the sky and he lands on the other side of the robot. Karciama slowly approaches him: "Time to end this" Karciama sits on DTs chest and gives some slow power blows, then some faster ones, then activates his inner jojo and starts punching him fast while shouting "Die!" repeatedly. Meanwhile DTs robotic turtle wakes up as the ID locked meme efficiency sword becomes unlocked. Eventually, DT becomes punched inside the robot and Karciama charges up a powerful slam, which he punches DT with. The robot fucking explodes and now there's a shitton of rubble falling down. Eventually it all calms down and Karciama approaches the barely functioning DT memeborg. "All right, I think we're about done here..." - Karciama cracks his knuckles. "DT." - Robot Turtle (or RT) asks for his attention, holding the sword in his mouth. "Shell!" - DT. is glad to see him. "Begin playback: "Two years I've been working towards this, and on the last day, hard-shell has me doubting the whole thing. We'll leave it up to fate then, shall we Shelly? A meme-off to the death, may the best memeborg win." - RT plays the audio. "Rob?!" - DT. believed for Rob to belong to the enemy. ""I meme him down, and that's that. Back to our regularly scheduled multi-server incident. But if he memes me... if I die here... the lock on my blade will disable after a couple of hours... what happens after that... is up to you, Shelly."" - RT finishes the recording. "Huh, even dead, that guy is a pain in my ass." - Karciama comments. "So... you think that little sword can save your master? Well, go ahead, then. But make no mistake, Fido. When I'm finished with him, you're next." - He threatens. "I was not designed to fear termination" - RT answers. Karciama is unsure why RT is even here then. "However, directive zero one is to ensure all memes acquired are preserved and passed along" - RT continues. "To expire here would violate that directive." "That's a good boy" - Karciama mocks RT. "However, DT. came to my server... I have learned from him. When Roberval fell, meme analysis was inconclusive... but that has changed. I have established new parameters, now. Created my own directives." - RT revealed. Karciama thought what that meant and realized it's meaning. "You little fuck!" - Karciama jumps to him. But it is already too late. RT already threw the sword to DT. and he caught it. "Damn diapsid!" - Karciama was enraged. "Tavern!" - DT. shouts across the field. Karciama is visibly annoyed for wasting more time. "I said my sword was a tool of germanpower... Not used in drama, not used for bias. But now... now I'm not so sure. And besides... this isn't my sword" - DT. says as he pulls out the sword and points it Karciama. Karciama jumps down from the platform and says: "Come on!" "OK." - DT. complies. "Let's meme." Karciama begins by sending some shockwaves through the ground by sheer force of strength. DT. notices that this sword actually causes harm to Karciama. The memes that this sword possesses are actually funny and bypass some of the protection that Karciama receives from the meme essence. Anyways Karciama constantly hits the ground, making some crazy shit happen whilst doing it. After a while, he jumps on some rubble and grabs more rubble from the ground, using it to throw at DT.. DT. cuts through the rubble and eventually cuts into Karciamas head and uses his momentum to throw him into more rubble, causing a lot of damage. More earth punching, rubble throwing and whatnot, DT. finally wears down the effect of Karciamas meme essence. Karciama, trying to finally get rid of DT. grabs him by the neck and tries to choke him, but DT. just kicks him in the face. Karciama charges his fists with memes and tries to beat the living meme out of DT. but he just chops Karciamas fists, not allowing him to charge his fists again, so instead Karciama charges at DT. but DT. just slashes at his chest and stabs the sword into him. Karciama is briefly stunned but regains control of himself, roars and tries to wrestle with DT. but Karciama is completely exhausted, just like his meme essence. DT. headbutts Karciama and pulls out his sword out of his stomach. He then hits his heart area multiple times and a hole forms from his strikes, he uses the opportunity and grabs Karciama by his heart. Karciama coughs up blood and says: "Well done, Turtle..." DT. tightens his grip over his heart and strains Karciama "Your dream gets memed with you" - He says and is about to pull his heart out. Karciama grabs him by the shoulder and pulls him back to his ear. "Maybe not... you've guaranteed the memes will spread, for a while longer at least... drama... will continue as an institution. As a meme. Men will maxi for drama they don't understand, arguments they don't believe in..." - Karciama coughs up more blood. "But at least I'll leave a worthy successor... you, Turtle. You meme your own behavior, use whatever bias you see fit... you don't let article 13 get in the way. And if it costs a few of your family members? So be it..." DT. puts his hand on Karciamas shoulder and rips his heart out and crushes it. The meme essence fades from Karciamas eyes and he chuckles: "Deep inside we're... kindred retards... you... and I..." DT. stares as Karciama expires, feeling neither satisfaction, sadness, wrath or anything else. He only feels that he has a new purpose. He will be his successor. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mALkd3DG6HA&t Category:Karciama